Level ToUch GRass is a secret, ‘therapeutic’ sublevel of The BackrooMs to encOurage More touching of Grass for some odd reason.
Contents
Touch Grass PSA
Oh! Uh...? I retract parts of my previous statement... DO NOT kiss the sun.
Hello! I am Dr. Astride F. Nightingale, certificated clinical psychologist and licensed therapist of The Backrooms.
Do not be alarmed, Gary!
I am here to discuss your electronic device usage. You, Gary, should be alarmed by how much time you spend staring into the blue glow of your electronic devices. You heard me correct… it is time for you to look away or up from your screens, go outside, kiss the sun, and yes… Touch Grass.
Description
Level Touch Grass is technically a secret, ‘therapeutic’ sublevel of Level -115. Here you will be greeted by the good doctor, Astride F. Nightingale. OK! Astride is a Boomer several centuries over. He will not complain about millennials killing stable industries, eating avocados, saving money, and spending less. He does not believe Gen Z is overly sensitive and acts like 'snowflakes'. He will break the fourth wall by insisting that you, Gary, reduce your usage of electronic devices and go outside. He will encourage you, Gary, to touch grass.
Do not pay any mind to my fellow dinosaurs. They are out of touch with the struggles of your generation. You all are making good progress. Your thoughts, feelings, and emotions are valid. But... you, Gary, are spending too much time on your electronic devices. The lights of your electronic devices can damage your eyes after prolonged use… take a break… get outside and touch grass.
This image was taken by Dr. Astride F. Nightingale featuring the open field designed for explorers to touch grass for therapeutic purposes.
Not physically ready to go outside yet? sigh
Level Touch Grass is also a spatial anomaly consisting of a sunny, clear blue sky, ambient temperatures and 12:12 light/dark cycle. This level also consist of a vast open field consisting of...
You guessed it...!
Grass for touching!
Youth today want to stay inside, play videogames, read posts on The Backrooms Wiki, and follow less than stellar humans on social media. There are two things on this list I will endorse but please... find time to go outside and touch grass.
I hope you go outside soon... until then, Level Touch Grass will do.
stares at you, Gary, in judgement
What Grass Should You Touch?
If you have a preferred grass, please, let my helper, Amygdala, assist you in selecting your choice of grass. Let him know, if you have an allergy to grass, we have other plants for your touch.
Below are three examples of some of the grass we have available for you to touch...
Kentucky Bluegrass
Sampler of Kentucky Bluegrass of Level Touch Grass
This grass is popular in the Northern parts of The Frontrooms of the U.S. It grows well in deep shade and is a deep, green color. The blades are V-shaped and pointed. The texture is soft and inviting. This grass will shrill in delight, "Yee-Haw!!" upon you stepping on it!! This grass demonstrates southern hospitality as it will bake you a pie and serve you sweetened iced tea.
Dichondra
Sampler of Dichondra of Level Touch Grass
This grass is popular in The Frontrooms of California and Arizona. It grows as a dense, creeping turf. It is a pale, green color. The blades are broadleaf. You might smell sage and hear the gentle song of Hopi women when interacting with this grass. This grass has also been known to induce a meditative and hallucinogenic trance in grass touchers. Some grass touchers claimed to have seen their spirit guide.
Bermuda Grass
Sampler of Bermuda Grass of Level Touch Grass
This grass is popular in golf courses of The Frontrooms. It grows as a thick, dense turf, and it is a deep green color. The blades are sharp and pointed. You might hear a disembodied shout of someone yelling, "Fore!!" Some explorers touching this grass reported finding golf balls in this grass. Some explorers have disappeared to only reappear later, claiming they played 1 to 4 rounds of golf.
When Should You Touch Grass?
As a clinician in the field of psychology of The Backrooms, touching grass should be done at least once a day for 20 minutes a day. If you are not touching the grass, least you are outside. Below is a list of when you really should touch grass.
- When you spend more than 6 hours on your electronic devices without breaking.
- When all of your social interactions and activities have become digital.
- Being a terrible human being on the internet ranging from trolling to online stalking to [censored to protect younger readers].
- When you call someone else out for their bullsh*t? Really... this would be the inappropriate time to touch grass. This individual is clearly deflecting. Hold their feet to the fire!!
Why Should You Touch Grass?
I am not telling you to touch grass to insult you, Gary.
The goal is to feel as happy as this cat. Please... touch grass.
There are many health benefits to going outside and touching grass, and they are following:
- Reduces your blood pressure
- Reduces your heartbeat
- Reduces stress
- Improves mood
- Improves focus
- Reduces sweaty palms I was informed that heavy palm sweat occurs in hardcore gamers. I will admit I am more accustomed to seeing this condition in individuals suffering from a panic attacks. Either way, do not despair! This grass will suck the sweat from your palms by means unknown.
- Accelerates healing
- Ages you gracefully Why do you think I look so young?
- Increases your productive in real life The Backrooms is not real... You must strike a balance between fantasy and reality for the sake of your health and well-being.
How Should You Touch Grass
What are you waiting for? This could be you touching grass.
There is no right or wrong way of touching the grass, but below are simple steps to touching the grass:
- Make your hand flat. You can spread your fingers if you wish.
- Direct your palm down towards the grass.
- Bend over and lower your person down towards the grass.
- Once your hand has made contact with the grass, move your hand over the grass in a waving movement.
- Continue this motion until your mood uplifts.
Colonies and Outposts
My apologizes! This space is for therapeutic purposes only. You are free to take naps here.
Entrances and Exits
Entrances
- To gain access to Level Touch Grass, you must be a psyche patient of Dr. Astride F. Nightingale in Level -115. You must request to access this secret space. You will be given a lawn chair and be transported to this space.
- (Secret entrance) You also can walk straight in a path while touching grass in Level 1 of The Spacerooms. Why? Hello...!! How did you get in here...? You touched grass where...? Oh... okay...!! Do need anything while you are down there...? No...? Okay!
Exits
- The only way to get out of Level Touch Grass is to touch grass until a better state of well-being is achieved. You will be transported back to Level -115 once your session is complete. Sessions can last for 30 minutes to 2.5 hours. You can access this space as many times as your wish.